Daily Wisdom

October 15, 2005

Iraqi Vote Turnout Disappointing

BAGHDAD, Iraq -- Early indications are that only about 61% of Iraqis turned out to vote on the new constitution. Pundits agreed that while this number is significantly higher than the turnout for typical American ballots, it is still substantially lower than the 99% turnout that Saddam Hussein was able to achieve while still in power.

"This clearly shows a lack of interest in democracy on the part of most Iraqis", said an unnamed political commentator, "and it suggests that under Saddam Hussein, Iraqis were more motivated to go out and vote".

Our reporters on the scene questioned a number of Iraqis as to why they failed to vote. Some of the answers we got went like this...

"Look, my kid's got soccer practice today, OK? Then I've got run to the store and pick up some Falafel while the electricity is still on, OK? And not only that, I can barely read anything through this 'Allah-be-praised'... burkha! Give me a break, OK?"

"Ummmm, well, ten members of my family have disappeared in the last six months. It's not easy living here in the Sunni triangle. I like my head, and I want to keep it close to my shoulders, thank you."

"Saddam refused to vote on the new constitution... and so do I!"

"REALLY? People are voting today? Like, no way MAN! That's just too KOOL! Maybe I'll go vote after I finish this hookah.... Wow!"

So there you have it... positive proof that the Iraqis despise George W. Bush, his militant actions in the Middle East, and the imperialist power of the evil American war machine. "Praise be to Allah... ohhh, and Death to America!"
--Associated Press writer Hakim Nasani (Al-Jazeera contributor)

UPDATE: Now that the voting is over it appears that at least 63% of Iraqis turned out to vote... Still not good enough. Death to America!
--
Hakim Nasani

6 Comments:

At 10/15/2005 4:11 PM , Blogger Kajun said...

Thank you for reminding me. I still haven't voted, today. Back in a few...

 
At 10/16/2005 8:50 AM , Anonymous Maggie said...

Cool! The Iraqi people are taking on attibutes of free America.

 
At 10/16/2005 9:26 AM , Blogger Libby Gone™ said...

AP has a story about a telephone interview that went something like this.
Reporter:" Sir are you going to vote today?"
Unnamed insurgent " Yes as soon as I finish assembling this car bo"
phone line went dead.

 
At 10/16/2005 8:14 PM , Blogger camojack said...

It's a higher percentage than any of our elections, I feel compelled to point out...

 
At 10/16/2005 9:42 PM , Blogger mig said...

Hey I voted twoce and got back in line for a third shot. But my khaki pants were a 'dead' give-away...

 
At 10/16/2005 9:44 PM , Blogger mig said...

Twoce is hindu for twice. I know this for sure cuz I looked it up on a blog site and the guy said so.

 

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