Daily Wisdom

August 25, 2005

Judge Roberts Under The Microscope

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Supreme Court nominee Judge John Roberts is being closely examined these days in preparation for the upcoming hearings by the Senate Judiciary Committee. He is under the microscope... literally. Senators Charles Schumer (D-NY) and Russ Feingold (D-WI) wrote a letter to Roberts yesterday, requesting him to submit samples of his blood, urine and DNA for testing to determine if he is qualified for the position of Supreme Court justice.

Senate Democrats have already analyzed a sample of Roberts' hair (which they claim to have obtained legally) and are now alleging that Roberts has split ends, and may have at one time had head lice. "We need to get to the bottom of this", said Schumer. "These findings represent serious character flaws and potential personal hygiene issues that must be investigated further".

White House spokesman Steve Schmidt said in response to the allegations that "the opponents of Judge Roberts are simply 'splitting hairs' and 'nit-picking'..."


At 8/25/2005 6:23 PM , Anonymous onlineanalyst said...

It makes one wonder whether the clowns on that committee would ever submit to or pass the scrutiny that they are giving.

The next thing we hear, they will be insisting that Judge Roberts undergo a colonoscopy to see if there is any s**t that he might be hiding.

At 8/25/2005 6:45 PM , Blogger Hawkeye® said...

You're absolutely correct. They wouldn't be able to stand up to the same kind of scrutiny.

At 8/25/2005 10:01 PM , Blogger RAM said...

Just for fun, let's take a look at the past of Teddy K, -----well just the one's that come to mind:

Committed voluntary/involutary manslaughter in 1969. No charges were filed!

Was caught running drunk and naked on a beach. No charges were filed!
(In the defense of the police, they may have thought Teddy was simply a whale trying to get back in the water).

Father made his fortune for bootlegging.

Both brothers were reported to have had extramarital affairs with hollywood starlets, including Marilyn Monroe. (Some think they may have something to do with her death).

Brother JFK, killed thousands of young Americans in southeast Asia. (OK, this one is not fair, I am just so used to hearing libs accuse GWB of this!)

Feel free to add your own, but keep in mind, Teddy, just as the Klintons, are masters at making previous indescretions paperwork and witnesses disappear.

At 8/26/2005 4:02 AM , Blogger camojack said...

He'll be confirmed.

The Dummycrat dumb-agogues can "circle jerk" awhile, but in the end...they'll lose.

At 8/26/2005 12:43 PM , Blogger Kajun said...

In answer to the democrat demand for a blood, urine, and DNA sample, Judge Roberts delivered the combined sample to Ted Kennedy's office this morning, along with a note that read: "This Bud's For You!"

At 8/26/2005 7:22 PM , Blogger MargeinMI said...

Ram: Put BigFatTeddy under a microscope? EWWWWWWWWWWWWW! I can't take looking at him with my nekkid eye!

OLA: Thank you for being 'family friendly' in your post. I wish I had been so circumspect in my last posting on camo's blog. He DELETED me!!!!!!! That's ok though: I was just spouting off at a moonbat, so it didn't really matter--mk77 wouldn't have actually taken my advice anyways.

kajun: "This BUD's for you." LOL

At 8/26/2005 9:11 PM , Blogger camojack said...

You were naughty and used a bad word on my blog; that's against my rules. Then that mk77 character used it in response...had to nip that in the bud, y'know?

At 8/27/2005 8:05 AM , Blogger MargeinMI said...


I know, I'm a baaaaad, baaaad girl!

At 8/27/2005 12:46 PM , Blogger Libby Gone™ said...

I haven't heard this much fuss about hair since the "Breck Girl" tried to be VP!


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