Daily Wisdom

June 27, 2005

Rumsfeld: Senate Insurgency Could Last Years

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In a series of interviews on various Sunday talk shows, Donald Rumsfeld, Secretary of Defense, said yesterday that the insurgency in the U.S. Sentate could go on for years. (See View From Above story dated June 23, 2005.)

"There seems to be an endless supply of 'homicide ranters' in the Senate that are willing to strap on an explosive filibuster and wipe out anyone in hearing distance with a blast of hot air", said Rumsfeld. "There is no quagmire in Iraq, but there is definitely a quagmire in the Senate", he continued.

Rumsfeld also fielded questions regarding allegations that he is to blame for the quagmire in the Senate. "That's just total nonsense", said Rumsfeld. "This situation was caused by the insurgents in the Senate, and it's a problem that the Senators will have to deal with themselves. Sure, we could send in troops and try to restore order, but then we would be labeled an 'occupying power'."

When asked if he felt that the insurgents in the Senate should be sent to the detention center at Guantanamo Bay, Rumsfeld responded in the negative. "I don't think our fine men and women in uniform should be exposed to that much abuse".


At 6/27/2005 9:38 AM , Anonymous onlineanalyst said...

Perhaps some mandatory retirements or term limits would quell the insurgency of those comfortable in the ooze of their clubbish sinecure.

At 6/27/2005 10:27 AM , Blogger Hawkeye® said...

The motion is seconded. All in favor? Say aye... AYE!

At 6/27/2005 12:20 PM , Blogger Kajun said...

When are we going to stop referring to them as "insurgents" and start calling them what they are...Terrorists.

At 6/27/2005 12:52 PM , Blogger Hawkeye® said...

But "insurgents" sounds much less hostile, and so much more "righteous" than "terrorists".

At 6/27/2005 2:26 PM , Blogger Kajun said...

I was referring to certain Senators!


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